Hi.
It's Paul here from selfhelpforlife.com, and in today's video I'm going to talk about how
to write affirmations that are believable and get results.
Now, every thought you think is an affirmation, especially thoughts that you think often,
so those repetitive thoughts, and we're also bombarded with negative messages, especially
from the media, so positive affirmations can help redress the balance, and I often say
that you're using affirmations anyway, so why not make them positive?
Because your unconscious mind, your subconscious mind, can't tell the difference between what
you think and tell it and reality.
This is especially true if you imagine it as well, so in this video I'm going to cover
10 ways to make affirmations more believable and to get better results with affirmations
as well.
Number one, make them believable.
For this first example I'm going to assume that you're not yet a millionaire.
Okay?
So if you are, congratulations.
Right now I'd like you to say out loud, if you can, or silently to yourself, but out
loud if you can, "I am a millionaire."
So, "I am a millionaire."
When you say that, what do you notice?
What do you notice inside?
What thoughts do you notice?
Is there an internal voice, maybe something saying like, "Oh, no, you're not.
No, that's impossible.
Don't be so stupid"?
Something like that.
They are the typical thoughts that often people would have to a statement like that, and those
thoughts are coming from a part of your mind called the critical faculty.
That's a part of the mind that's protecting you from new ideas that are not believable,
so any kind of affirmation that's not believable is going to get caught by the critical faculty
and it won't go inside to the unconscious mind, okay?
Often a great analogy or way of thinking about the critical faculty, I got from Andrew Parr
and I'll post a link to his website below this video, but he talks about it as being
like the bouncer in a nightclub, so imagining a nightclub.
The bouncer is there, and the bouncer is deciding who's going to get into the nightclub and
who isn't probably based on what they look like and dress code and various things, whether
they're on the guest list, all those kind of things.
When we have a new idea it's like the critical faculty or the bouncer in our mind is saying,
"Yes, I accept this idea.
I'm going to let this idea in, or I'm not going to accept it."
Now thinking of the bouncer in the nightclub example, if you go up to the bouncer directly
and try and push yourself in, that's not going to work.
He's just going to not let you in or he's going to get his mates and line up the door
so you can't get in.
But if maybe you started talking to him in a nice way and maybe distracted him in some
way, something like that, that maybe you could slip inside while there's a bit of confusion,
something like that.
Okay, so it's a little bit the same with affirmations.
If you can kind of befriend your critical faculty, some way approach it indirectly,
more indirectly and more believable way, then the affirmation is more likely to stick, okay?
Andrew Parr calls this the door policy for new ideas, so what is your door policy for
new ideas?
Okay, so we're talking about sort of indirectly getting round this bouncer or door policy
for new ideas.
One way of doing that is use an "I want" statement, so, "I want to be a millionaire."
Try and say that to yourself right now.
"I want to be a millionaire."
Say it out loud if you can.
What's that like?
Now I suspect your critical faculty, that door policy for new ideas, is likely to accept
that more.
It's more believable.
You know, it might say something like that, "Yeah, maybe.
Yeah, maybe I can accept that."
So it's like a stepping stone, and what will happen is as you say that affirmation more
and more often you take action towards being a millionaire, your belief will grow and then
you can take it to the next step.
Okay, so if any affirmation seems unbelievable or unrealistic, start with, "I want."
Okay?
"I want" whatever the affirmation is.
Then when that starts to become more believable, you can change the statement to "I can," so,
"I can be a millionaire."
Say that to yourself or out loud now.
What's that like?
Then at some point as you're taking more steps to becoming a millionaire, that belief, "I
can be a millionaire," that affirmation, "I can be a millionaire," that's going to become
more believable and more comfortable.
Your door policy for new ideas begins to accept that more, and at that stage you can change
it to, "I am a millionaire."
Okay?
So start with an "I want" statement.
Then when you're ready and it feels believable, change to "I can't" and then change it to
"I am."
Now, quite a few other personal development experts say that affirmations must start with
"I am."
Okay?
That's okay as long as the critical faculty, the door policy for new ideas, accepts that
direct statement, but if it doesn't, then that affirmation is just not going to slip
into the unconscious mind.
It's just going to be rejected.
It's unbelievable and it won't work.
Okay.
Another thing that a lot of personal development experts say as well is that affirmations must
be in the present tense, so if you actually say, "I want to be a millionaire" or, "I can
be a millionaire," they're kind of in the future tense.
Okay?
But if the mind accepts that, that's much more important that it takes it in, so the
most important thing is the mind is got to accept the affirmation.
Having said that, I do tend to avoid "I will" because that does tend to keep you in the
future tense forever, so I do avoid using "I will," so I would never say, "I will be
a millionaire," for instance.
Okay.
Also what's good about "I want" and "I can" affirmations is that your unconscious mind
is picking up on the want to be a millionaire or the millionaire bit or whatever it is the
affirmation is, so it's hearing that positive outcome.
Okay, so that was number one, making it believable, so I've shown you my approach for doing that.
The second one is stepping stones, so try this affirmation emphasise.
"Every day I am making progress to becoming a millionaire."
Okay.
What's that like?
What's your critical faculty think of that one?
It seems a lot more believable, doesn't it?
Or what about, "Every day I am becoming one step closer to becoming a millionaire"?
Okay, again, much more believable, and notice that both of those statements are using "I
ams" as well, so an "I am" statement is fine if you can make the affirmation itself more
believable.
Okay?
Thinking about the door policy for new ideas, yes, it can accept that.
It's more believable.
The classic stepping stone affirmation is, "Every day, in every way, I am getting better
and better," by Émile Coué.
I suspect you've heard of that one before.
Number three is to be specific, so the affirmation, "I want to be rich," that's too vague.
You know, what does rich mean?
Being much more specific, "I want to earn $115,000 by the end of 2018," that's much
more specific.
You've got a specific amount there and you've got a specific date as well.
How about the affirmation, "I want to lose weight?"
Again, that's pretty vague, so a much better affirmation might be something like, "I enjoy
wearing a size 12 dress."
See how much more specific that is.
Now, what about the affirmation, "I am confident"?
Is that specific or vague?
Okay, we're going to do a little exercise right now.
What I want you to do is I want you to complete this sentence, so the sentence is, "Confidence
means being able to ... " Complete the sentence, so, "Confidence means being able to ... " Now
I'll give you a few seconds to complete that sentence, so grab a piece of paper or write
a note on your computer.
"Confidence means being able to ... " Okay.
What do you notice?
Okay, while you're writing that down what I want to encourage you to do when you write
that down is to put the answer in the comments because I'd love to see what you come up with,
but some of the typical ones that have come up when I've done this exercise in the past
would be things like, "Confidence means being able to do something scary and know it will
turn out okay."
Or, "Confidence means being able to do your best and be okay with the outcome."
Or, "Confidence means being able to feel that I can do it."
Or, "Confidence means being able to just be myself and not rely on the opinions of others."
Or, "To be comfortable with people from many backgrounds."
Or, "Be able to pick up the phone and talk clearly and enthusiastically to 10 new customers
a day."
So you can see how much more specific that confidence affirmation is.
In turning some of those statements that I just mentioned, those ending of that sentence
into affirmations, you could have examples such as, "I always do my best and I know that
it will turn out okay."
Notice how much more specific that is to "I am confident."
Or, "I always feel that I can do it."
Or, "I easily pick up the phone and talk clearly and enthusiastically to 10 new customers today."
Be as specific as you can with your affirmations.
A vague affirmation will give you a vague and uncertain result.
Number four, write affirmations in the positive.
Now remember that your unconscious mind thinks in pictures and it doesn't hear the word "no,"
so for example, if I have the affirmation, "I no longer eat Kentucky Fried Chicken,"
what's your brain imagining as I'm saying that?
You're probably noticing what Kentucky Fried Chicken looks like, smells like.
You may even notice the taste of it, so though the affirmation is about no longer eating
it or not eating it, your brain has to picture it to be able to think not to do it, okay?
So that's why you should always write your affirmations in the positive, so a better
affirmation would be something like, "I only eat food that nourishes the body and makes
me feel great."
So, "I only eat food that nourishes my body and makes me feel great."
Okay?
It's stated in the positive.
To help you do that, always avoid using the word "no, not, never, or can't" in affirmations.
Okay, so the fifth one is to write affirmations that support your goals, so before you start
writing your affirmations write down your goals first.
Hopefully you've already done that.
Hopefully you already have some goals, but if you don't, write down some goals first
and then you can create affirmations that support achieving those goals.
For example, if you have a goal that is to lose 10 kilos, so let's say you want to go
from 80 kilos to 70 kilos, then affirmations could be things like, "I am quickly and easily
achieving my ideal weight of 70 kilos."
Or, "I enjoy and look forward to exercising four times a week."
Or, "I naturally eat food that supports my weight loss goals and I enjoy them too."
Something like that.
Number six, write outcome and process affirmations.
For example, "I want to be a millionaire" is an outcome affirmation, and it's very broad
and it's very big, and it's also not completely within my control.
Also, "I want to lose 20 kilos" is also not completely within your control because there's
things that you'll need to do to achieve that goal.
Okay, so they are good examples of outcome affirmations.
Process affirmations will be something like, for the millionaire example, "I am starting
a new business that follows my passion."
Or, "I'm seeing 20 clients a week and making $2,000."
Or, "I invest 10% of everything I earn."
Okay?
They're stepping stone affirmations towards getting to that higher goal of becoming a
millionaire or achieving a certain level of income.
The seventh one is to write words that trigger emotions.
Affirmations always work much better when you can feel the affirmation and experience
the emotion of it at the same time.
One way to do that is to put emotionally charged words in your affirmations, so here are some
example words you could use, words such as "inspired, powerful, happy, grateful, ecstatic,
alive, joyful, delighted, loving, beautiful, secure, serene, triumphant, enthusiastic,
peaceful, calm, great, wonderful."
An example could be, "I feel wonderful fitting into a size 12 dress."
Number eight is to write affirmations to support a new identity.
Okay, so everything stems from your sense of identity, and the fastest way to make any
kind of change in life is to develop a new sense of identity, so your identity drives
your beliefs, which then drive the thoughts that you have, which then drives the feelings
that you have, which then drives the actions that you take.
Okay?
So an example with losing weight.
If you think about the sense of identity of a fitness trainer, it's probably going to
be something like, "I am someone that eats to nourish the body and exercise it daily
to have the body that I deserve."
So if that really permeates the sense of self, that whole idea of eating to nourish the body
and exercising daily, then everything they do, all their beliefs, their beliefs around
exercise, it's going to be fun, it's something that's important, it's a must for me to do.
Their food choices if they're eating to nourish the body, then their food choices are going
to be food that's going to do that.
Their thoughts are going to be positive and all around that as well.
They're going to have positive feelings they eat the right foods and exercise, and then
they're going to easily exercise and do all the right things as well.
The sense of identity for a millionaire might be something like, "I am a person that makes
money easily by making good business decisions, by investing wisely, and offering as much
value to others as I possibly can."
Or more simply it may be just, "I am a millionaire," as long as that's believable to that person.
This is where the power of an "I am" statement comes in to really help change your sense
of identity, but again, only if that "I am" statement is believable.
Number nine, use resources or experiences from the past.
You probably have emotions or skills from the present or the past that can be used as
fuel for your future affirmations.
For example, this one here, it could be, "I use the drive and determination that I have
in my career to achieve my ideal weight of 70 kilos."
Okay?
This could be like a businessperson that really had great success in their career, they got
real drive, real determination, they've made a lot of success, but maybe they've been struggling
to have that drive and determination to lose weight.
Okay?
What this affirmation is doing is allowing them to use what they already have to focus
on that weight loss goal, if that makes sense, so think about things you've done well in
the past, resources, emotions, and apply those to affirmations to help you make changes in
the future.
Number 10, the last one, is to write affirmations to automatically replace repetitive negative
thoughts and feelings.
Okay?
What you do with this one is you grab a sheet of A4 paper, and on the left hand side you
write down all those repetitive thoughts that you have all the time, all those negative
repetitive thoughts and any feelings as well, okay?
Now on the right hand side you write an affirmation that's the opposite of that, okay?
If you find you're often like, judging people, you might have an affirmation that says something
like, "I accept everyone just the way they are."
Or if you often have thoughts around pain in the body, you could have an affirmation
like, "Every cell of my body vibrates with energy and health."
Or if you often feel stuck, you could have an affirmation that's something like, "if
I'm committed, there's always a way."
Okay?
So whenever you have that stuck feeling, you can immediately say that affirmation.
The key here is that if you have them already lined up in advance, you can just say them
as soon as that thoughts comes into mind, so when want to think about a replacement,
you can just nip that thought in the bud straight away.
If you find you're focusing on things that you don't have in your life or things that
are working, you could have an affirmation like, "The more I focus on what I do want,
the faster I will get it."
Something like that.
Okay, so that was the final one.
A few points in closing.
Be creative about what you write affirmations about.
You can write affirmations about thinking patterns you want to change, life experiences
you want to improve, experiences you'd like to have in life, feelings you'd like to enjoy,
and what you'd like your life to be like.
Okay, so be creative.
Think about all the different areas that you can write affirmations for.
These are my 10 ways to write affirmations that are both believable and get results,
so I encourage you to try them out, give them a go, and do let me know how you get on.
Please leave a comment below.
I'd love to hear how you're getting on.
Do also leave a comment to let me know how you completed that sentence about confidence.
I'd love to hear what came up with you for that.
As always, please give this video a thumbs up if you liked it.
Please also share this video with a friend.
If you feel there's someone out there that could benefit from this, please do share the
video with them.
Please subscribe if you haven't already, and click the bell icon so you'll be notified
of future videos that I'm typically doing weekly at the moment, so hit the bell icon
and you'll get notified when I release a new video.
Thank you for watching, and I look forward to sharing more great information with you
shortly.
Bye for now.
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