yes I am wearing a jacket inside
who the fuck even cares anymore
what up losers welcome back to my youtube channel
happy new year
so I've watched a couple of other people do this where they
basically take a year and review and talk about all the shitty things they've done this yer
you know what new year new chances to do new shitty things but
I would like to take this moment to tell everyone about some of the really just
horrible things I did in 2017
God knows I have enough to share
first shitty thing I did in 2017: I got myself evicted from a grocery store
a fucking grocery store
"Anette how do you get yourself evicted from a grocery store?" you ask
well here's how I figured out
so apparently in Norway you can't take razors down from like the shelf
we're talking just like regular razors.
because I guess they're considered a weapon or something
I saw something and I thought it looked interesting
and I wanted to take it out to look at it because I'm 5'8 not 6'3
I can't look at something that's like up here so I tried to take it down and as I pulled it off
the little ro d it was on there was just beeping and flashing lights
and I'm like what the FUCK is going on?
You know I'm on the verge of tears
there's beeping and flashing lights and people are looking at me and I'm
standing here with a razor in my hand and this woman comes up to me and I would
like to just tell you this is in a Norwegian grocery store where they have
to wear all green everything like most like citrusy green color and like plaid
pants that was what she was wearing and she looked like all her children hated
her and she has had four husbands who's all cheated on her.
And she comes up to me and she said "did you do this?"
woman I'm the only one with the fucking razor in my hand and tears in my eyes, who the fuck did you think did this?
basically she told me in so many words that I had to get out.
second shitty thing I did this year was I made a tinder account.
that's not the shitty part
I made an actual like proper tinder account and I found this guy
I'm like I know you
you have a girlfriend
and I'm like okay maybe this is like an
old account and I swipe right just to check and I get a match
Boy you trouble
I screen shot it and I send it to his girlfriend
and I'm like hey what up better keep an eye on your man
and the next day they broke up
Honestly that wasn't shitty of me that was shitty of him
I was being a good person if anything
number three I totalled my car
and when I say totalled I mean there was
no way it was going to get repaired. I totalled my car and I ruined another
person's car for a couple of grand more specifically it was 37,000 Norwegian
krones you do the math I just know that my parents would not happy about it I
wasn't drunk I wasn't texting I wasn't doing anything illegal.
And I was like getting closer to the car I just remember
"you know what I'm dying now and that's ok"
this is smashing and then I was not dead and I got so angry
I'm like god dammit like I would rather be dead right now they'd have to deal with
the consequences of crashing and totalling my own car
RIP to my car we're never going to get a driving with Anette in that car again
Number four
I got shitfaced drunk at a work party
every year in the town city whatever there's something called elvefestivalen which
means River festival
lucky for us we were the like VIP place basically for people to go
it's so much to do
you're so busy
to congratulate everyone that basically this is over for this
year everyone that worked during the river festival weekend gets to come and
party and celebrate and there's an open bar
like half of the people here are bartenders basically
my happy ass did a lot of... just drank a lot I don't know how
much I had but I know I had too much and there was the one person that I just had
something.. A beef or something with and I wanted to tell him that I didn't like
him and I was just like constantly being like I'm gonna tell him who he is I'm
gonna fight him like I was so I just wanted him to know that I fucking
despised his ass.
my mum had to drive me home
when I get out my mom starts laughing I'm like what are you laughing for and I had
basically ripped my pants in the back so like underneath both my ass cheeks it
was just like a nice little rip.
The fifth shitty thing I did this year was telling
everyone that I had an upload schedule on youtube and then following it for
less than a month that's incredibly.. Just so shitty.
Being like "hey every Wednesday!" SYKE
this one isn't shitty towards anyone else but myself
I bought two like tubs of Ben and Jerry's ice cream and ate both of them why are
why are you doing that but like this your life whatever
I'm lactose intolerant.
And I know I'm lactose intolerant and I still fucking did it
I'm like maybe not today yes every day every day
I blocked my mom on all social media and you would too honestly
if you were getting the amount of notifications. Constantly sending you things
like mom please I can't keep up with this and she just keeps
and I'm like you know what? if you won't listen to me I will make you listen to me
and I blocked her on all social media and she's still mad about it.
I got shit-faced again
I get real angry and emotional when I'm drunk, and I had a fight with two of my friends
and I decided that I was going to walk my ass home
shout-out to my friend Hanne this time she drove me to the party
and she was supposed to pick me up at the party I just texted her and I said
"I'm walking home right now"
I was wearing converse. I didn't I could not for the life of me tie the shoes
I had my bottle of like schnapps basically
drinking from it as I want swaying in the streets
my friend's texting me and she's like "where are you I'm going to pick you up"
and I'm like "I'm walking!"
why is this so uncomfortable and I look down and I've walked out of my shoes
I have to walk back in my socks trying to find my fucking shoes
and then I put them back on and I'm like swaying
my friend finds me and the moment I sit down in her car I just start bawling.
And I'm like "I wanna go home!"
I watched something I'm pretty sure was a drug deal
well like something of that sort and I just think ignored it until after the fact
I was like "oh... that's little sketchy innit?"
so during my exam I drove to the side of an island basically
to get like some shots for my exam film
when I got there there was this guy who was like real like pole thin real raggedy looking
And I'm walking up with my god damn camera, lenses and tripod and all that jazz and I'm
just setting it up like to get some shots of the water and all that jazz and
he just looks at me and I'm lik smiling at him like
"what up fellow citizen
just don't mind me! Trying to get my average grade up!"
Another guy comes up to and I see them like looking at me and one of them takes like a tiny
bag out and the other one you start shaking his head and then they go back to
the other guy's car and they drive away and I'm just fucking filming and then I
sit down in my car to drive home and I'm like
"Hold on a second... did I just ruin someone's drug deal?"
I did not take my parents nor did I dress up for my own graduation.
I don't think I realize how important this was I guess I just thought it was like a bish bosh
get in get out get your diploma and like bounce
so I showed up in like stained jeans and sandals
everyone else is like having their parents everyone's wearing a bunad
which is like the traditional Norwegian like you only wear that on like Constitution day basically
and I'm.... well I'm glad I look like an asshole
I started my college application five days before the deadline
now this might not seem that horrible for some people
I had to make a short film
write a pitch for a TV show and also sell myself as like a great fucking student in five days
didn't get into college but that's like not on this.. it's like 11.5
basically I didn't get into college
I reported a guy I know to the police
again this wasn't as shitty on my part as it was on his because he was driving around without a license
and if he sees this or anyone else sees this and tells him
I might get in trouble with like some shady people for doing this but . also
like don't drive around without a driver's license like there's a reason
why you didn't get your driver's license
this wasn't shitty because I did it, this was shitty because I ignored it
I finally bit the dust and realized erm.... I don't have as perfect vision as I used to think I did
things that further away turns out aren't just supposed to be like blurry and unreadable
I used glasses when I was younger
when I was like in fourth grade and then I was like "fuck this! This is annoying
I have to pull them out of my bag? I can't be bothered"
and then we were like sitting during presentations and I'm like asking the people sitting with
"Can you read that?"
but my vision isn't terrible. It really isn't.
When it's really bright or if it's bad lighting or something like.. I can't
"Can you read that?"
they're like yes and I'm like
"whoa shit if for me it just looks like some black dots"
yeah I went around for 19 years just assuming that my vision was fine, when it wasn't
number 14 I cried between classes
I am the teacher!
media theory is really slow and I know it's really slow
media theory's basically analysing things like "have you seen this commercial before?"
and nothing I'm like "are you even breathing?"
and I get so frustrated like I'm trying my best and you're not like you not even looking at me!
I walked into the the teachers toilet which is like there's a one toilet that we have
it's just the teachers toilet. I sat there for like 20 minutes just crying.
I forgot a total of eight birthdays this year.
everyone in my family except like three people
The only peoples birthdays I didn't forget were my two best friends one of them because I wrote
it down in my planner the other 'cause her birthday's the day before mine.
My mum and my sister whose birthdays are five days apart
my (other) sister's birthday
whose the day after mine
I'm a mess I'm sorry and I'm a mess
I faked being sick so I didn't have to go to a family gathering
and then I sat at home eating McDonalds instead
most of my family doesn't like me
I was just like why do I have to go? like no one wants me here anyway
I had a lot more fun doing that than what I would have had going to that family gathering
that's for goddamn sure
The last shitty thing that I did this year
was I spent actual hard earned money cash
on tinder
you get like super likes every 24 hours or something but sometimes you just see
someone and you're like I want you to know that you're a cutie pattootie
So I spend money to buy super likes on tinder just so people knew that I really
like their face.
so those are some of the shitty things I did in 2017.
Please for the love of God leave me comments telling me some of the awful things you did
because I don't think I could stand it feeling so alone and so ashamed.
Doesn't matter what it was maybe you stole 10 pounds maybe you ran over your
grandmother's cat I want to hear about it
and you know I'll see you guys next time
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