Hi everyone, it's Lauren and I'm in a bit
of a funny mood today because I've had a
bit of a cold over the weekend and it's
that really annoying type of cold where
I'm being that really annoying type of
person, because it's not actually that bad I've just
got a sore throat and you know, I feel
really tired, but I'm making such a meal
out of it I was like 'Will you need to bring me a
coffee, I don't feel well!'
I feel like putting it on for the camera
like *cough cough* So I thought I'd just sit down and have a
little bit of chat with my coffee and
I've got Peter Rabbit here as well to keep
me company. Peter Rabbit has been with me
or has belonged to me since the Christmas
before I was born
I was born in April but my Nan obviously
could not contain herself and got me a
little Peter Rabbit so he's very old now
he's 28
well I'm 28, he must be 28 and a half 28
and a half years old!
there he is, he's looking a bit scrappy now
ain'tcha mate? So a couple of things I did
want to say in this video was one that I
am going to be doing a Q&A
soonish, probably in the next week or so
I'm going to film it. If you have any
question for me that you would like
me to answer or anything you just want
to talk about, book related or non
book related I am easy, then leave some
questions in the comments below this
video
I was going to do that thing where
people go 'Oh loads of you have been
asking me to do a Q&A, so hey I'm gonna
do one!' but loads of you haven't been
asking; one person asked! But I just
thought I'd do on any way, like just
inflict myself upon you like whether you
have questions or not! So yes just do let
me know if there's anything you want to
talk about. And then the other thing I
really wanted to mention in the video is
An American in Paris which is a musical
dance show basically, which is on at
Dominion Theatre in London at the moment
it's just transferred from being on
Broadway and I really want to talk about
it because it's amazing, it's one of the
best pieces of theatre I've seen on
stage for a really long time, where you
just go in and everything about it, I was
like wow, I love it everything is so
slick
I couldn't fault anything about it
really and I feel like it deserves a lot
of hype and attention because I know a
lot of people really enjoyed La La Land
and were really into the old Hollywood
musical look and this is like a good
version of La La Land!
I hope I don't upset people with my
opinion that La La Land was distinctly
average, because the old school musicals
like the Singin' in the Rains
are like, those kind of musicals are
my favourite films and the people in
those films could act, sing and dance and
they were triple threats and they were
amazing and I feel like people who can
do those three things exist and those
people are in An American in Paris
So if you really liked that kind of
La La Land vibe then please, please,
please go see it! There is no plot to it
really but then some of my favourite
musicals don't really have plots because
the plot is that she's a ballet dancer
and he's an artist and together they end
up putting on a show, and I love, I love
love, love films or musicals
where the plot is 'we're going to put on
a show' because it's just gratuitous song
and dance for no reason and that's what
I love most! The leads are a professional ballet
dancers like Robert Fairchild has been the
New York City Ballet, Leanne Cope has
been in the Royal Ballet, like these
people are super, super talented and they
can act and sing! And I do not like many
things, let me tell you ,I love going
to theatre I love, I love art, I love
appreciating art, but my way of
appreciating art is normally to discuss
all the things that I would do
differently or go I didn't like this bit
I didn't like that bit, and unless...maybe
I'm just quite a negative person I don't
know but I don't often really gush about
something. I've been really getting into
my own ballet as well recently so I've
started a new ballet class, a new term
and I'm going twice a week now which has
been very enjoyable so far. It's a little
bit embarrassing as the new class I've
joined...the class I wanted to do had
switched days I couldn't make it so I've
gone a level below where I should be, so I'm
kind of the best one in the class and
then another class that I'm doing
another point in the week it's kind of a
bit harder and it's definitely...there's
people that go there that are
professionals like that's an amazing
class and that's too hard for me almost
so I've got this funny little balance of
a very easy technique based class
and then one which is a little bit more
challenging so I'm hoping that that is
going to work for me, and what I really want
to do is next term and start back en
pointe because my ankles are probably not
well they haven't been strong recently
but I've just been really working on it
try and get them better because I just really
I love ballet
I love
dancing and I want to be able to do it and
do it well and that's all I want to do I
mean I was going down a bit of a YouTube
hole the other day just watching those
like videos behind the scenes of
professional dancers and just being like
'why aren't I this??' if I could, honestly if I
could do one thing, if I could magically
be something it would be be a ballet
dancer that is absolutely what I
would be if I could change my whole life
obviously I can't do that! I know I can't
do it professionally, but then it's just
being able to do something to a
standard where you can enjoy it yourself which i think is
the main thing, it's like why any of us
have hobbies. I don't know, where's the
line between doing something because
it's your career and just doing it just
because just because you want to do it? I
feel like this is my issue with most
things though is that I want...like the
thing is I want to do it really well and
I want to do everything! I was talking to
Will yesterday about kind of extra
stuff because I've started looking at
amdram theater companies and I like
literally emailed one saying 'yeah I really
want to audition' and I thought 'what am I
doing?? I don't have time!' There
isn't enough time in my day to like do
ballet twice a week and like learn
Spanish and like do my booktube channel
and also that just be part of this
amdram stage company and also I've applied
to run the London Marathon next
year! So where do I think this time is
coming from? I think I just really want
to be back at school. Basically, my
perfect life would be if I didn't work, I
didn't have to go to work I just did
things to better myself you know like
accomplished women in the 18th century
that's what I want to be I think, I
want to be able to learn languages and
play my violin and dance and I just want
to do all the stuff I don't actually
won't have to like make money! I don't know
how I achieve this dream but I just I
want to do too much and I can't choose
between all the things I want to do that is my
problem isn't it?! Let me know if you
feel the same way I feel like I was
always someone who didn't really have a
passion so therefore I've been a real
like jack-of-all-trades
like my passion is always everything
like I can't decide oh, I really want to
be a pianist, so it's like so I'd really
work on it I just kind of half worked at
everything so I'm just like okay
everything...or not even okay, I'm not
even that good. Here's something that
I find quite a lot
is that I think, so when I was at school
I could speak Spanish and I could speak
French I could play piano and violin and
like in my head I can still do those
things, even though I haven't done that I
haven't practiced them really or done
them seriously for like 10 years and I
forget that I can't do things, so in my
head I'm like, I bet if I just started
practicing my violin I'd be really good
in like six months, I mean like I probably
wouldn't! I think in my head I
feel like I have all these skills but
they're just, they're old skills I don't
have them anymore. I have this real
disconnect between my head in terms of
what I actually can do and what I
actually am, and in my head what I think
I am or I think I could have been with
just like a really little bit of
practice, which is a bit worrying because
I kind of want to have a realistic view
of myself and my skills my skill set
and what I'm able to achieve. This has
got quite deep and existential quite
quickly, which is not really what I had
planned for this video but I do think
it's an interesting question because we
talk about creativity and what makes a
creative person and I don't think I am
that creative but I do like creativity
in terms of interpretation, so like I
wouldn't write something myself or
compose something myself or draw
something out of nothing myself, but I've
always enjoyed like dancing which is you
know you're given choreography and you
interpret it, or acting like I could
interpret a script or a piece of music
like I like interpreting things which is
why I suppose I've got a YouTube channel where
I read books and then interpret them for
you and I review them!
Is that being creative in itself or is that
just enjoying creativity as a thing?
I don't know, it's an interesting question
and one I would like you to answer for
me in the comments! Thanks for joining me
and Peter Rabbit I actually got him
because I thought if I hold him I won't
be playing around with my hands so much
and moving around in the video, which is what
I do all the time. Actually what I've
been doing is just playing with him
so I hope it hasn't been annoying for
you! I just need to like take my hands
under my bum and just sit still. So I
hope that you are well and you're having
a lovely day wherever you are and you're
not feeling as bunged up as I am
and I will see you my next video, bye!
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