It's the Wednesday Wisdom Show and you want to know - What is spiritual love?
I think that maybe the most fascinating topic across-the-board to all humans, no matter
where they exist - other than survival, once we have that covered - is love.
We tie the value of our life very much to our experience, our access to the experience
of love.
We also feel that the solution to our problems lies in love.
Songwriters say that, philosophers, also politicians say it.
What do we mean when we say this?
I'll tell you this now - that spiritual love does not exist in human nature at all.
It's really opposite to our nature but we need to know the difference between these
two things.
The human level of love, what we know what any adult knows -that it's not the Hollywood
version of love.
We know that love as we experience it, that fills our heart and makes us see beauty and
a changed world for awhile - you know, where we're floating on air!
This is something that happens to us but it doesn't necessarily last and we try to prepare
ourselves for the fact that this is so - to accommodate in our situations, but we're still
being run - even though the quality of absolute beauty and Springtime may leave, depart from
the setting of our marriage or relationships.
We're still looking for the same essential quality of human love that keeps us in it.
We make compromises but we're still trying to do the same thing.
When we do that we are trying, within a certain level, to get what we need out of the relationship
- to also give - but the reason that we're giving is to make sure that there is some
kind of quality that's coming back to us.
Now I know that already you're saying no - that's not true.
I'm not like that in my relationship, but let's look at it a little more closely so
that we can see the difference between these two levels.
First of all, that sense of beauty that we have in relation to each other is triggered
by a system that's owned by Nature, not by us.
If certain hormones are triggered, certain needs are trigger towards another, then they
are important to us while that's happening.
When they are no longer triggered by the functions of nature we begin to lose that sensation
and they are no longer important to us in the same way.
What do I mean by important to us?
We're not relating to the other for the sake of the other.
We are essentially relating to the other for the sake of personal fulfillment.
This is true actually even in parent and child situations, even with a mother and a child.
Now mother will give everything for that child, will take care of it while she's ill, while
she herself, the mother is ill, will sacrifice everything for the child - but in the end
when we look at what is happening there is a fulfillment that is coming to the mother
through this act - and this is love within Human Nature.
Now you must be saying to yourself "what do you want from me!
I mean how can you - first of all, I don't believe you, secondly what kind of a standard
is this?
Who can possibly act completely altruistically in every level of connection with other people!"
The fact is that spiritual love is actually against human nature.
It's not made of the same thing that our natural love is made of - so we need to know the difference
between the two.
Many, many people feel and say that it is impossible to love another unless I can first
love myself.
But this is exactly the point.
The reason that we don't love others is that we love ourselves to the exclusion of others.
That's why we feel shy.
That's why we feel inadequate.
That's why we feel burdened by our self-criticism.
What are those things?
- They are a love and protection of everything that has to do with me.
I want to make certain that my feelings won't be hurt, that others will not look at me in
such a way that I would begin to disrespect myself, that in some way I would feel inadequate,
that I would be unprotected, that my ego would be laid out there and all of my faults would
be evident to others.
I will not put myself in a place like that!
Why?
- Because I love myself and I'm focused on myself to the exclusion of others.
Think about it - It's this crippling constant evaluation only of myself and my own condition.
My thoughts can't move to others.
I can't feel what they feel.
We're unable to open our hearts and sense what's going on in the other and to think
about what would be good for them, to sort of lose ourselves in the connection with others.
It's not that I don't love myself - it's that I love myself to the exclusion of others!
That, in a nutshell, is what the two-dimensional human nature, natural love is like.
So all of this drama, pleasure, romance and giving isn't spiritual in fact it isn't even
love - it's just an attraction or repulsion to something that is pleasurable, sweet - or
something that is bitter.
And we always go for what sweet and we run away from what's bitter - because nature is
running that level of our nature.
So if we're going to look to spiritual love to save us from the situation that we're in
- I mean look at America, look at the condition of the world, look where we are with nature,
look where we are with the economic system, how we're invested in claiming that the other
is racist - all of these things that are rolling us towards terrible confrontations.
If we all have in common the idea that love and connection is the answer, then what's
the degree of love and what's the kind of connection that's actually going to do this
for us?
Love is a spiritual force that holds opposites together.
It's a sovereign, primordial intention that stands above two things that are absolutely
different and opposed to each other - and gives life to both of them, and brings them
to good.
If we want to understand how we can experience spiritual love we need to understand - how
does a human access this?
How do we have to think?
In what way do we need to relate to each other that would be called spiritual love, in such
a way that this spiritual force would be evoked and really help us in our situation?
Well, the good news is that real love, spiritual love can only exist when there is hatred.
Love has to make a bridge.
Love has to have the medium of hatred before it can be felt in any way, before it has any
work to do.
Hatred, meaning separation and opposition, is the medium through which the force, like
the force of electricity, the force of love can be experienced.
We don't experience electricity directly, we feel its action.
Unless there's something for it to work on and work against you don't feel that there's
force there.
We've spoken about this before, but the matter in which love can operate on its ultimate
level - is above hatred.
It's got to have disconnection in order to evoke the Supreme force of connection.
Try to imagine a situation where you have the ability to maintain a connection, in which
you're looking for the well-being of a person or group of people that you hate - meaning
you don't want anything to do with them, you want them to be wrong, you want your position
and the things that you think are very important to dominate.
You want to eradicate that opposition - whether it's in society, whether it's in family, whether
it's a personal thing, whether it's in you know, where you work.
You hate - meaning that there is a profound disconnection there.
You feel as though you're polar opposites.
Now imagine the ability to maintain a connection - not on the level where the difference is,
not where the- disconnection is, but at another place where you're not considering how this
is going to affect you - but the only thing you care about is that the connection should
be there.
This is going to be in a place that doesn't have any of that opposition in it.
It's going to be at a point at which you actually are connected with that person - and that
means that there is actually nothing in nature that needs to be eradicated.
Everything in nature really has a right to exist - it's supposed to be there.
Why?
Because it's intended to get us to experience love not in our nature, for our own well-being
- and focused on what's good for us or what might be dangerous to us - but on what's good
for everything.
Because that is the connective force.
Think about it.
What else would hold everything together but a feeling that wants to make sure that everything
that exists serves its proper purpose, fulfills itself in the way that it should according
to how it was made?
Are you thinking about that?
Because if you really are then all of these other things are coming up aren't they?
- "I don't want to be a doormat.
Other people will take advantage of me.
That's too dangerous!
We actually don't have anything in common!
I'm afraid to speak to these people!
I'm afraid to look for that point of connection!"
That's an indication of the difference between something that is actually true - that there
is such a place as that within us and within our hearts and in everyone that is possible
to reach - BUT we don't reach it by using our regular nature and our regular definition
of love.
This is work, and the only place where this sort of supreme primordial force of connection
can happen is in situations like that.
And we have plenty of those situations right now, So that means we're primed for it!
There's this beautiful article from a little book called the Shamati, a Kabbalistic article
called the Profit of the Land.
I'll read you a little quote here...
"It's known that nothing appears in its true form, only in its opposite, as far as light
excelleth darkness.
And this means that every thing points to another and by the opposite of something the
existence of its opposite can be perceived."
For us, everything first appears in its negative form.
Everything good first appears in our experience as its opposite form, and the degree of opposition
tells you something about the coming good.
So love is this force that connects everything and this is the thing that we need to get
to.
Everything means - despite whatever its nature is.
It's very lofty.
It's what we need and it seems that it's impossible, but it's not impossible - it's just not on
the two-dimensional level of human nature, it's not on the mechanical level.
We can learn to function above that level and that means that in order to discover the
spiritual nature, the nature of the Creator, the nature of the light - we do that by exposing
our own nature.
We do it by exposing what we call the "revelation of evil" or "hatred".
It's not a bad thing it's a functional thing, it's a good thing because of what it leads
to.
We don't learn about spirituality directly, we learn it by revealing what the limitations
of our nature is, and by learning to function above that.
So that's it for this Wednesday but I would really love to do a show where I can just
answer a lot of questions that you may have, so any kind of question that you have about
spirituality about Kabbalah, about life problems, things that you're curious about - the deep
questions that you have - put them in the comments and I'll do a whole show just taking
all of your questions and trying to answer them all - that should be fun.
If you think that this is fun in fact, then please like, share, comment and subscribe.
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